"why are you doing that? "
this is the question i've grown accustomed to asking myself of late. i ask it because God asks it. He, of course, already knows the answer. but i think He wants to give me the opportunity to work it out on my own. similar to working out a math problem or diagramming a sentence, sometimes time, thought and honest assessment have to take place before you can know the answer.
God wants me to know the motivating factor behind every decision i make. because the final outcome depends on it. at first glance, i think that we think that we can usually justify most of our actions. but it's the deeper, underlying truth God is getting at. that deep-seated, secret story that defines the why of our ways.
so...."why are you doing that?" or "why did you do that?" what was your motivation?
i just want to live according to Gods will and plan, i want His Word to permeate my behavior. but i'm absolutely aware that is not always the case. there have been plenty of times i have felt stuck in a cycle of indecision and can't seem to figure out which way is up. and then i start digging around in my heart, ask God to come in and do some pruning, some weeding, some work. and i find that my motivation was ME! not HIM!! my desire to have MY WAY was at the core, not my desire for HIS WAY. and then i have to go back and start again, looking at the process of decision making from a new perspective, with fresh eyes.
the verses i claim as mine in march are found in Galatians chapter 5. i chose the message translation because i really gravitated toward that word 'motivated'. i'm convinced that this principal of allowing God's Spirit to be the motivation for my life (and every one of my decisions, thoughts and actions) is something He would have me meditate on this month.
'...live freely, animated and motivated by God's Spirit. then you won't feed the compulsions of selfishness. for there is a root of sinful self-interest in us that is at odds with a free spirit, just as the free spirit is incompatible with selfishness. these two ways of life are antithetical so that you cannot live at times one way and at times another way according to how you feel on any given day. why don't you choose to be led by the Spirit and so escape the erratic compulsions of a law dominated existence?'
i love that verse 18 ends with a question. a challenge.
as i've chosen a somewhat lengthy passage, my goal is to memorize the first verse and meditate daily on the rest. and don't forget, write out your verse or verses in multiple places. the aim is first and foremost to get the Word into our hearts, permanently planted there. but the intention is also to create a pattern of self-examination, reflection and deliberate surrender to God the Father, our reason for being.